STATIC

By Kit Iyer

I CAN’T TELL WHERE MY FEET ARE. I SEE YOU STANDING NEXT TO ME, YOUR HAIR GLOWING IN THE LIGHT IN MY EYES, AND I CAN’T FEEL MY FEET.

I SEE THE WORLD SPINNING, THE STARS ARE FLYING AND THE LEAVES ARE CHANGING, YET I DON’T KNOW WHERE MY FEET ARE OR IF THERE’S A HEAD ON MY BODY.

IF MY BODY IS MINE AND THAT’S HOW I SEE YOU. IF MY HANDS ARE MINE AND THAT’S HOW I FEEL YOU. IF MY HEART IS BEATING WITH NOTHING IN BETWEEN AND THAT IS HOW I LOVE YOU.

BUT NONE OF THOSE THINGS ARE MINE. THEY’RE NOT MINE OR YOURS OR THAT LITTLE GIRL’S. WE’VE ALWAYS HELD HANDS WITH OUR WORDS.

SO MAYBE I DON’T KNOW WHERE MY FEET ARE, AND MAYBE I CAN’T TOUCH YOUR FACE. BUT I HEAR YOUR VOICE AND I KNOW I’M OKAY, SO FOR NOW WE CAN EXIST IN THIS PLACE.

WE’LL CHOOSE TO EXIST IN A WORLD WE CAN’T FEEL BECAUSE HOW ELSE DO WE KNOW HOW TO LIVE? WE’LL LIVE IN THIS WORLD OF BABIES AND BIRDS AND PRAY THEY DON’T FLY TOO HIGH. WE’LL HOLD CLOSE OUR WORDS AND OUR LOVED LITTLE GIRLS AND HOPE ONE DAY IT WILL FADE.

About the piece:

STATIC is a prose poem I wrote a few months ago. It is a product of intense mental disillusions and strife that I only finished recently after finally feeling some clarity for the first time in a year. I never really understood what it meant to dissociate or to feel out of your body until last year. I don't even know if that's what I had been experiencing when I wrote STATIC, but I would say it was written at the peak of whatever I was feeling.

As somewhat of a spiritual person, I still don't fully believe I'm always in my body and it can make life really hard sometimes. STATIC was how I made sense of all this by coming to terms with the fact that there's more life outside my physical body. Maybe that's crazy, but I spend my time now trying to focus more on how I feel and how I speak to people rather than how I look or if my body reflects who I am inside.

About the Author:

Kritika Iyer, known by most as Kit, is a sophomore at BU studying English and Journalism. Kit is from Iowa, and as an Indian American, she focuses a lot of her personal writing on identity and finding truth in life. She hopes her words will reach people in ways her actions can’t.