by Megan Balani
I have always been very self driven, wanting to achieve so much but not knowing how to channel it. I look up to athletes a lot, not really because of how they play, but how they think and what their personalities are like.
What I want to emulate most about them is their confidence. But at the same time, I feel there is a blurry border between me and those athletes. Personally, I’m an athlete, but not a professional. These pro athletes dedicate their lives to something they wanted to do at such an early age. In return, they continue to strengthen their confidence. As someone who still struggles with confidence and admires athletes, I am trying to find something that makes me feel as powerful as an athlete.
I know that the same level of conviction, vision, and assertiveness can be emulated by anyone. I’m still figuring out what I am passionate about, and there is one thing that I think about a lot: suits. I have visualized myself in a suit every day for two years straight. Every day for 730 days. As I mentioned in the beginning, I love athletes and their confidence. So why not link sports and suits?
Being in a suit (or even imagining myself in one as I walk) makes me feel like I’m in an Under Armour or Nike commercial. You know the adrenaline rush that you get from seeing athletes dominating their fields and perspiring for the win? That’s what I want to feel. The visualizing of the suit gives me the same feeling of being alone in a stadium in the dark with one or two stadium lights eating up the darkness on the grass tarp.
Since I have been visualizing myself in a suit for so long, I have put a ton of mental energy into believing that I am a confident and assertive person who knows what she wants. To my surprise, people have seen a difference in how I carry myself throughout those 730 days. My circles of friends have seen me be more relaxed when things don’t go my way; they have heard me talk about myself and others in a positive light; they have seen me set boundaries and feel comfortable saying “no”; they have seen me be more honest with myself when I’m feeling emotionally off; and they have overall seen me stroke my internal fire to grow while figuring out how to let go of self-imposed mental blockage that hold me back. Even with people I just met, they could see the confidence that I radiated. It is as if it was the scent of perfume that got carried through the wind.
I feel that whichever avenues you find your passion from, those avenues will soon converge into a smooth road where you will be able to further intertwine your ideas. Suits and sports were avenues that further influenced my confidence. I hope others can find aspects of their interests that further grow them into a stronger person.